a silly question

If this bird flu really takes flight (haha get it?) do we still get to eat chicken?

AHHH!

They did eye surgery in "olden times" in France! I had lasik a few years ago and that was frightening enough. I had numbing eye drops, they used lasers. Apparently in the roman empire they lacked those drops and used sharp needles and other things to suck out cataracts and such. Yuck, I have such eyeball issues.

Girly girls don't get black eyes

And yet somehow I managed to, sober, at 5 in the morning. Tripped over the cat and smacked my cheekbone into the door frame. I rock. It seems to have gotten darker as time has passed, very uncool. It does not make me want to go out into public, let along go get the job I really need.

I also hope it has faded enough to cover up by friday, as no one likes a black eyed bunny.

Totally unrelated note: CPD and I were talking about food last night because I was trying to decide if i was hungry enough to go actually get some from downstairs. We stumbled upon the fruit roll-up during the conversation. Oh the thesises we came up with. I mean wrapping that chewy square around your finger to eat it had to subconciously preclude actions in later life, be it oral sex or a true disddain for sticky fingers, or as he like to call them, "jam hands". THis makes no sense you had to be there.

Also

I found out when I was named Sandra by my father, he had taken Sandra Day O'Connor into consideration. I find that to be an honor, to be inspired to be named Sandra after a truly amazing and influential woman in American history.

request

if you read this blog, comment on it, no one does and i feel unloved.

yes

Today has been exciting for two reasons, 1st, I found out my halloween costume is in the mail. I was concerned it wouldn't get here in time for the weekend before halloween. As most girls know, this is the only holiday a girl can ho themselves out and not get crap for it. Although, ass CPD agrees, mine is classy. There will be pictures. I'm curious if anyone else is going to a party that requires dressing up, or just ressing up, if so as what? Aside from you Eminem, I know yours.

The second reason I am happy is that I got the tip of my tooth back. Now my smile is back to perfection (haha right). It still feels a bit gritty, and I never knew they made liquid tooth, let alone liquid tooth that matches mine and dries rock hard under and unltra violet light. Weird.

As for my leg, its still predicting rainshowers about eight hours before they start. I thought that whole "i feel it in my bones" was a bunch of bullshit. It was not.

In a week or so check out the SBS website, there will be a ton of new merchandise posted and all put together by my boyfriend. It maybe freelance but it means a nice dinner out for me, I hope.

Is thisweeken homecoming? I heard it was. Is anyone coming home? I'm doubting it b/c my people dont care about football. Although they do like to drink so who knows.

Update

I'm feeling ok now, I needed time in a dark room in bed. I really apreciate everyone's concern though, that helped alot, even if I dont answer thye phone it doesnt mean im not listening. Thankyou guys. As many of you know going off strong meds is very hard, whether you've sone it yourself or witnessed someone who has. Thank you again

You want a part 2?

Too bad its my blog and I'll give it to you later. I'm going off some meds and instead of feeling better I'm FIERCELY depressed. I'm back at the point of not wanting to hurt the people who love me, so I'm sticking around, but that's the only reason. This is rough. Very rough. But I do have my beloved soaps (the shows on the history channel, I think its ww2 week or something, I'm engulfed in bw footage of a time that mattered). I'm tumbling farther and farther down my mental stability hill.

Part 1

Another later night for no apparent reason.

I suppose I could share something I am quite excited about but doubt anyone will notice. About 3 years ago, as of March 2006, I tripped and fell on my way to cross Albert by the hamster cage. Had all systems been go, I would have put my arms out in front of me and caught my fall. Needless to say, all systems are never go after a random house party with an abundance of alcohol. My front left tooth took the brunt of the force, along with the knees of my very nice jeans. I didn't notice I had chipped it until we reached Grand River and I crunched down on something very hard. I'm finally getting this eyesore fixed next week.

I think most anyone who has known me for very long can attest too the fact that, despite my best efforts, I am not all that coordinated. I lack a certain "grace" much of the time. Alcohol indiscipline this trait. However I can be just as accident -prone sober.

The irony of this all is that I find one of the most amusing things in the world to be a person tripping, falling or stumbling. It is hilarious. But karma is a bitch.

I have a whole list of stupid things I've run into, bruised, broke, and sprained. Those are coming in part 2.

Its been a while- or Wow I used a lot of parentheses

So I thought I would update this. Last night I was what Bill was in high school (and still) to our group of girlfriends to a group of guyfriends (does that make sense?). Although I assume some of the dialogue was cleaned up a bit for my sake, I was surprised how similar it was to hanging out with a bunch of my friends.

They went surfing today (yes, at Lake Michigan). And, aside from the toxic smell of resin being applied to Fiberglas it was a fun night (FYI- 90% of people who work with Fiberglas as a career die of cancer). Since the house we were hanging out at was that of a Med student and son of two doctors, an interesting (?) experiment was proposed. What happens to one's blood pressure before and after smoking a bowl (Lets remember I am one half of a pot free couple). The results were inconclusive. Why you ask? Because of the two participants taking in the experiment, one forgot what his original blood pressure number was and the other forgot which arm he originally took it on. This outcome wasn't all that surprising, if you think about it.

Other interesting moments included A LOT of surf/skate stories (oh wait I don't surf or skate... But whatever, boys who do are hot) stories about their high school days (my late elementary and middle school years), my skinny ass boyfriend in his wet suit seeing if it had an affect on his blood pressure (possibly), Several boys trying on their wet suits on to stretch them out and make sure everything was A-OK for today (I must say it was cute watching these guys thin their later 20's getting all hyped up to surf some seven foot waves on a Great Lake). And I must say that neoprene is quite slimming. Not that my boyfriend needs that, he looks like some sort of mythological creature who is real skinny and extra goofy when he's confined to his wetsuit.

This week should be eventful, Monday I drop off an application in person to get a job- lets hope, at Younkers (bla but its temporary). Figure out if we're flying or driving to Florida, and ideally, finalaize Halloween plans.

I believe its a party at the Montie house but I don't know, although with my costume getting in will not be a problem I don't think. I'm being Gloria Steinem, during her 3 week research stint as a playboy bunny. And this isn't a trashy outfit either, its much more Reese Witherspoon a la Legally Blonde, but black like Bridget Jones (only I'm a bit slimmer). Its fairly retro. I've now made it easy for Colin to pick an outfit, and a confortable one at that. Luckily, I found out, his friends have fun with Halloween. There will be pictures. I will be freezing my ass off. Or should I say tail.

To make a full circle here, I was so surprised to see how guys hung out when they were just chilling, so much like us girls, only much more PG- we seem to discuss a few more details... It really makes me miss having all of my friends from our group in hs nearby, as opposed to so many so far away. It gave me something to look forward to, it had been about 10 years since all these guys sat around in the same room just hanging out having a beer, but they did finally all meet up, not for a holiday or wedding or funeral, but just because they could again. So Bitches and Bill, I hope we can all sit around chilling like we used to before a decade passes. I miss our times together a lot.

Life avec le sinus infection

I'm finally going to the doctor tomorrow morning. THANK GOD. For the past 8 days I have had an awful head/face ache. Very uncool. Although I figured my one magic allergy shot would exxempt me from any sinus infections this year, I'm thinking I'm wrong. While not nearly as severe as past infections this time of year, I can definately feel it. My teeth even hurt. I was so hell bent on thinking I had a migraine, it took Days for COlin to convince me that I was throwing up because of my sinuses draining not out my nose, and my teeth hurt because the inside of my face/head was infected. It finally sunk in, so I'll be a normal person next week, lets hope.

Also i watched the Graduate for the first time since Nancy avec Collin et Stanislas dans Francais. My french blows. But I miss our time together and our nasty cork tasting champagne. FANTASTIC MOVIE. Hilarious and touching. Just like my CPD, but of course with no physical touching. HAHA.

Insane East Lansing

My football weekend, a timeline.

Friday, 8:45-
Arrive at Beal co-op, after driving through the insanity that is pregame downtown East Lansing. Watch Colin and Dixon play darts for a long time. It is at this point I begin drinking my gin and tonic.

9:30- Laughin arrives, the dart game fizzles as Colin has yet to aquire any points. I continue with the G&T's. Drinks must be kicking in for all of us because the "Do you orgasm in your sleep?" conversation is quite long and involved. Being the only girl I say "I assume so but I would be asleep so it would be hard to tell", the guys offer varied responses.

10:45- Put in the movie about surfing. Continue to drink heavily. Find out that some guy who got punched in the temple like a week ago randomly died in his sleep. This story makes anyone who was thinking of studying stop, and realize life is meant to be lived. The neighbors come over for a bit and play darts while we are trying to watch the movie, luckily they left shortly after losing interest in the game.

Midnight: After sitting on the porch for a bit 3 chubby girls from owosso show up, very drunk, although I really should not have been a judge of what "really drunk" was at that point. At one point the bear coat came out, bc it was cold outside. Dixon was the only one whho could really pull it off and look like a true pimp.

12:30- After taking a walk down MAC to check out the neighboring parties, end up at one, where being the good person I am, got to chatting with Willy the homeless dude, who was a little nuts but was just trying to get a buck by collecting empties at the parties. I bitched out a frat boy who started swearing at Willy, the frat boy left because he was a pussy and afraid of a girl (who had 3 or 4 not small at all guys to back her up) Apologize to Willy explaining we idnt rink beer but if we did he could have all the cans b/c we never take them back. Head back down MAC to chill outside a bit longer and watch the madness.

Saturday, 2am- We finally go to bed around this time, I think. Well we didn't fall asleep then, there was about an hours worth of drunken attemps to have sex.

3am- About a 5th of gin (dear god- btw I rarely if ever have drank so much in one night) and a pack of cigarettes we call it a night and pass out.

7:30am. Its starting to get loud outside.

7:50 am- the movie Taxi comes on HBO and we watch that.

10:00am- "Wow that movie sucked" "I'm hungover" "Alright lets get to the store"

10:20 am- Begin out trek down the alley, still drunk, to buy more. Someone was already puking in the co-op's yard. Pass literally hundreds of people. People who would most likely not schedule a class this early but would be up at 7 sharp to start drinking.

10:27- Arrive at Spartan Spirits, East Lansing is alive. Maybe its because I never really tailgated, or get up early enough to witness what goes on during a football morning but this was down right insane. Get what we need from the store.

10:38- Get to the register, but 2 bottles of cranberry juice, a 5th of smirnoff, and some smokes.

10:45- walk down MAC back to the house, toss on some music, and again, begin drinking.

11:20 am- Keep watching all the people and alums walk and drive by, end up taking care of a friend of a friend's dog, Isabelle for an hour.

11:30- WHoa feeling a little queasy.

11:35- Throwing up everything I had drank that was left in my stomach.

11:40: "You look like shit" "I feel like shit, I just puked" "You did? well you kind of look like you did" "Thats bc I did."

12:00pm- Game time. Decide against anymore to drink except soda water (wise choice)

1pm- Thrilling game, but I go into Colin's room and pass out, I ask to be awoke when there are 5 minutes left.

5 minutes until the end 31-31, I am woken up but promptly fall back asleep.

8:30pm- Wake up and have to leave, have to drive out on the lawn bc im parked in. Narrowly avoid a cop moment- PHEW. I guess they had bigger fish to fry than someone who hadnt yet put on their headlights.

9:pm- arrive home, make a hamburger but its undercooked so I only eat the edges. Feed the cat and fall into bed.

9:30pm- Out like a light.

Sunday 2am- Woken by tickly whiskers and a sandpaper tongue on my face.

4:30 am- anxiety/panic attack the likes of which most will never witness. Take appropriate med, feed milo grab some water and its back to bed.

3:08 pm-Mother arrives home from the cottage. My anxiety is back as well.

3:40pm- begin to write in hopes that I will not have to take another Xanax. Unfortunately, while it has felt good to get these crazy past days written about, the anxiety is still here so its back to bed I go.

All of this and State didn't win. But I did because, aside from the unanticipated extreme drunkenness (should have eaten something yesterday) I had a great time, and so has everyone else I've spoken with.